My Dear Friends,
I’ve been meaning to write this for a while now.
I’m sorry I missed your baby shower. I’m sorry I said “no” once again to dinner out. I’m sorry I had to cancel because of this that or another. I’m sorry I see and read your texts but days later I still haven’t responded. I’m sorry I never return your calls (and even more so sorry I ignore them sometimes). I’m sorry I don’t wish you a happy birthday the minute I wake up on your special day. I’m sorry I missed your bridal shower. I’m sorry I’m usually the last to say congrats on your latest achievement. I’m sorry I left our plans early. I’m sorry I let you down. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
But. Really. I’m not all at the same time. See, my family is a big part of my village lately. I have 4 little people and 1 big one that depend on me. They need me in ways I don’t always even understand. We’re busier than I could’ve ever imagined and busier than Caleb and I want to be and it makes it hard. Right now my life is different than yours. Our age and where we “should” be in life isn’t the same. I know it and I respect your desire to talk wedding plans and honeymoons, and waiting for those pregnancy lines to pop up (or not pop up). I know one day you’ll understand and you’ll be in my shoes now and you’ll be the busy one. I won’t hold it against you. I’ll cherish your time because I know what a gift it really is. A sacrifice not just on you, but your future little village, too.
So I’m asking that you forgive me for all the times I let you down, because honest I wish I didn’t. But I’m also asking you try to understand that sports and homework and speeches and doctors appointments like crazy (seriously 5 this week!) all have to come first because my village needs me and I have faith you see my time spent has to change for a while.
You’ll always be important to me and I hope our friendships can weather the shift we are in. I know I’m willing to be patient and hang on to the bimonthly chats and biannual visits. I hope you can, too.
Look at it this way, I’ll have great advice when your babes get to their teenage years 😉
Hugs from afar,